Goal Setting 2.0

Office External Monitor - Do I need Goals ?

I heard one neuroscientists Reinke this automatic desire to seek as the second priority hardwired into our nervous system the first system is designed to protect us and keep us safe. To help us live to fight another day. But after that there’s a built in mechanism to seek.

  • Why do I need to define goals for improving my dance ?

Office Laptop - The Power of Goal Setting.

Great satisfaction comes from the progress towards these goals. The pursuit of the goal itself not only that when we progress in one area of our life it spills into all the other areas of our life.

Material items and other accomplishments can be quickly assimilated too and easily forgotten. But the real value is in the person that you become.

  • Latin Dance.
    • It makes me happy, it gives me purpose and direction.
    • It gives me satisfaction when I purse my dancing goals.
    • It has spilled in other aspects of my life (fitness, confidence with girls, socialising) etc.
    • Focusing my energy in specific direction, and avoid negative emotions.
    • Avoiding un-necessary waste of time, and distractions.
    • It has given me something worth living.
    • Love for music and dance was always there.
    • Most of all, it has taught me to love myself, and live with myself.

Office Headphone - Interested but not Commitied.

I am interested in her, therefore headphone, but not committed to her else Podcast

And here’s the dirty little truth about goals and accomplishing any type of change or behavior. What you want and the price you’re willing to pay has got to match up.

Are negative self-talk in that voice in your head wins out when circumstances don’t go our way.

But when you’re truly committed you want something so bad you’ll do whatever it takes. That’s when the magic happens.

When you’re setting your goals. You really need to ensure that you’re willing to pay the price.

Pen Holder - Set and Forget

I mean hey I wrote down goals. Most people don’t even do that right. But I would review them very infrequently if at all to the point where I would stumble across them and I would say oh wow I had that on there.

I had written goals but there was no accountability to it by not reviewing them consistently. I was able to let myself off the hook and avoid any fear of failure. After all you can’t feel bad about not hitting your goals if you can’t remember what they are or don’t look at them right.

Regardless of which technique you use is very important for you to set aside the time and continually review your goals on a regular basis.

Office Table - Your Goals Are the Wrong Size

You need to find that zone that puts you outside your comfort zone and will stretch you.

Field studies on the effects of goal setting and performance and found that 90 percent of the time specific and challenging but again not too challenging lead to higher performance goals than just do your best.

From my experience 90 day goals for most things are a great sweet spot.

Office Table - Stationary Drawer - Focusing on To Many Goals at One Time

Too many goals can dilute your focus and spread your mental energy to thin the sweet spot of how many goals to focus on at once can depend on how big your goals are and the difficulty or complexity.

For most people I usually recommend keeping their goals to around three to five that they’re focusing on.

Macbook Extended Monitor - A Small Why

Why do you want the goal you see when your Y is big enough then you will almost always figure out the how the how you’re going to achieve the goal is less important than why you want to achieve the goal.

A big y provides that emotional fuel to propel you forward even if you’re tired and don’t feel like it because change in new behaviors can be difficult and you’re almost certain to face obstacles along the way.

It’s not about what you can do but what you will do. And change is often a result of either some type of inspiration or desire or desperation. One of those two things is often required to break you out of your comfort zone.

Macbook Screen - ScreenBrush - Writing Goals on Macbook Screen

But for right now know that yes there is a distinct advantage to writing down your goals and not writing them down is one of our goal setting pitfalls.

Logi Headphone - Viewing Goals as Pass Fail

The real power is in who you become in pursuit of that goal.

The goal is not as important as who you become in the process. Because think about it. At the end of your life it’s not going to be the accomplishments and the material things that will matter nearly as much as the person you became along the way.

Is that really a failure because you only lost 20 pounds and not your goal of 30. I hope you would agree with me and say absolutely not. The value is really in the new eating habits. The workout routine. More energy in the drive that you picked up along the way. The fact of the matter is who you become in pursuit of your goals is the real victory.

The power is in the process and not the end result. So remember when you’re setting your goals it’s not about failure or success. It’s about who you become on that path of trying to achieve your goals.

Step 1 - Self Evaluation and Your Current Reality

Step one is being honest with where you are today your current reality.

It’s important to set aside some time to get honest and reflect and evaluate where we are today as a first step for us to build a great tomorrow.

We’ve got a family side a career side professional spiritual finances friends hobbies.

This is sometimes called a wheel of life or a balance wheel. This particular example has eight sections but there’s no magic to the number 8. You can break your life into four sections six or even nine. Whatever makes the most sense for your individual situation. We usually put the majority of our focus in one or two areas in really excel in those areas but might be failing miserably in others. And that’s why we want to look at each area separately. Now that you’ve got your categories I want you to write out what it would look like for you to be fully satisfied in each area. Take a moment in each section and really visualize what success in each area would look like.

You’re probably going to be tempted to passively listen to this course and go you know I’ll do that later maybe this weekend when I’ve got some more time but to get maximum results please do these exercises as we go. They’re going to build on each other. So pause this video right now and write out your description of success in each one of your life categories.

Before we move forward once you’ve painted your picture I want you to be honest and rate each one on a scale of one to 10 and 10 means that you’re completely happy and fulfilled in that area of your life in a one means that you couldn’t imagine it getting any worse.s

1: Baby Steps - Indicates the tiniest of improvements, just getting started on the journey.

2: Inching Along - Suggests slow progress, but at least moving forward, even if it’s just by an inch.

3: Making Strides - Represents noticeable progress, taking steps in the right direction.

4: Steady and Ready - Signifies consistent improvement, staying on track and ready for more.

5: High Five - Reflects a commendable level of progress, worthy of celebration and a high-five.

6: Winning Streak - Indicates a series of victories, where progress is building up and momentum is on your side.

7: Rocking It - Signifies exceptional progress, rocking the improvement game and leaving others impressed.

8: Leveling Up - Represents leveling up your improvement, reaching new heights and unlocking new achievements.

9: Superstar Mode - Reflects superstar-level improvement, where you’re shining brightly and exceeding all expectations.

10: Legendary Status - Indicates legendary improvement, achieving the highest level of greatness and becoming a true inspiration.

  1. One means that you couldn’t imagine it getting any worse

  2. Ten means that you’re completely happy and fulfilled in that area of your life

  • Money
    • 25% More from where I am will be good. This goodness will last for next 2 years.
    • I should spend at least 1 hour in a week to review my investment.
  • Relationships
    • I should completely cut out people from my life, the likes of M, A.
    • I should just maintain need-basis friendship with people like VJ.
    • I should also keep in touch with SP who will turn out to be long term friend.
    • I should be on lookout for people like Pa.
    • I should completely avoid people like NF.
  • Health 8/10
    • I feel like beast, thanks to Gym, Dance and Ayurvedic Supplements.
  • Growth
    • Growth Means: Be very successful in the field of content creation.
    • Growth Means: Become a very good dancer.
    • Growth Means: Have 15% Salary Growth every year.
  • Life Purpose
    • Be very successful in the field of content creation.
    • Travel and Explore the world.
  • Home Environment
  • Sprituality
  • Self Worth
    • Well I just do not know how to answer this.

Bookmark.16.July.20203

Step 2 - Defining and Understanding Your Values

This is why we first want to have a clear understanding of what’s most important to you what you value most then your decision making becomes that much easier.

We also have values that we want to avoid at all costs. These are our own Wave values. Those emotional states are feelings that we will do just about anything to not experience. You must understand that because our brain is wired to protect us above all else we will most often do much more to avoid pain than we will to seek gain.

Failure, Rejection, boredom, overwhelm, loneliness pressure or stress.

But don’t forget that 99 percent of us myself included will do much more to avoid those negative emotions then they will to see those positive emotions. So when you want to start your own business become wealthy. Write a book. Change jobs or enter into a new relationship. But you associate strong negative potential consequences to change failure or rejection. You’ll hold yourself back and wonder why you can’t stay motivated or follow through.

Let’s look at another one. If you’re number one towards value with success but your number one away value is to avoid failure you’ve got a problem because rarely the success or achievement come without failure. In fact most successful people have a different view of failure. They realize that it’s part of the process and is not something to be avoided. Failure simply feedback something you learn from and move on. It’s an event that is necessary on the path to success.

No wonder I would find excuse after excuse to keep me from getting out there and setting me up for any type of potential rejection or failure. It was it worth it to me. Subconsciously I would talk myself out of it no matter how much I said I wanted to succeed because the desire to avoid pain almost always wins out over seeking now when I catch myself procrastinating or avoiding something I know why and I can decide to go work on overriding my exaggerated fears and reframe what’s been holding me back.

After we set our goals because setting them is not enough. If you have internal conflicts that are going to sabotage you along the way. So right now I want you to make your list of top five toured values these things that you seek. Above all else and your top five away values those things that you try to avoid at all costs.

My Towards Value My Away Value
Accomplishments Failures
Health Stress
Content Creation Rejections
Loss
Overwhelm
Lonliness

Step 3 - Getting Chrystal Clear On What You Want

  • Money - 8/10 Job@26July2023
    • 25% More from where I am will be good. This goodness will last for next 2 years.
My Current State My Desired State Gap My Towards Value My Away Value
40+ 50+ by 2023 25% It will be my Accomplishment It will give me a sense of overcome my Failures, Rejection and Loss.
  • Money
    • Find one multibagger stock every month. 50K/Month.
    • Review MFs each 3 months.
  • Relationships
    • I should completely cut out people from my life, the likes of M, A.
    • I should just maintain need-basis friendship with people like VJ.
    • I should also keep in touch with SP who will turn out to be long term friend.
    • I should be on lookout for people like Pa.
    • I should completely avoid people like NF.
  • Health 8/10
    • I feel like beast, thanks to Gym, Dance and Ayurvedic Supplements.
  • Growth
    • Growth Means: Be very successful in the field of content creation.
    • Growth Means: Become a very good dancer.
    • Growth Means: Have 15% Salary Growth every year.
  • Life Purpose
    • Be very successful in the field of content creation.
    • Travel and Explore the world.
  • Home Environment
  • Sprituality
  • Self Worth
    • Well I just do not know how to answer this.

Step 4 - Brainstorming and Identifying Options

Don’t second guess yourself or ask if it’s possible or feasible just throw it all out on paper and will filter the options in another step. Encourage yourself to be bold even throw out wild ideas. Again we’re going to get pragmatic in due time.

New habits new behaviors new beliefs mindsets resources people new information to gain new skills to acquire you name it. Get it down on paper grab your first area and I want you to think of every possible thing that’s related to bridging that gap between where you are today and where you’re committing to bringing it to.

Step 5 - Writing Our Goals Using the S.M.A.R.T.E.R. Framework

The S is for specific. Your goal is to be as specific as possible exactly what she won. Many times you need to keep breaking it down to get to the level of specificity required it needs to be clear enough that she can picture it and know whether or not you’ve achieved it. Make sure you avoid the generic and the vague.

M stands for measurable. You can’t manage or determine your progress towards a goal. If you can’t measure it. If you say I want to earn more money. Not only is that not very specific but technically one dollar would be more money. Or I want to be happier. How do you measure happier. You want to be able to determine at any given point along the way if you’re ahead behind or right on track with your goal.

The A stands for actionable the best goals start with a verb like create run finish eliminate or earn.

The R is for realistic now realistic doesn’t necessarily mean easy. And we’ve talked about how the best goals are just right. Meaning not too easy but not so difficult that you don’t believe you can achieve it. And you might not know exactly how to do it but you have to believe that you can figure out a way. So make sure your goal passes the belief test of you believing that you can get there

T stands for time bound. A great goal has a deadline. A goal without a deadline is not really a goal. It’s a wish or a dream. You should have a date for each one of your goals dates and deadlines. Create urgency and energy but most importantly it creates accountability. This is critical. I told you we weren’t stopping at just smart goals that we were doing smart earth goals and so the East stands for exciting. This is a critical piece that’s not included in the original smart goal form format. But your goal has to be worth it to your brain in order to break out of your comfort zone and try something new. Your brain wants to be as efficient with as with this resources and save energy.

And if your goal is not exciting it’s likely to die out. And in our next lecture we’re going to talk about exactly how to make it exciting. Are is for relevant to your seasonal life. Life is very different for people when you’re 20 and perhaps had just a few responsibilities or maybe only yourself to worry about then when you’re 35 and might have young children with a wife and additional responsibilities it’s very easy to compare ourselves to others and look at society as a whole. But these goals need to fit your season of life and where you are today. Now that’s the smarter framework that we’re going to use as a guide for writing your goals to make sure the design the right way. So let’s put these steps together so far from the last step you should have in your list of the one to three areas that you identified as the ones you want to focus on. First you’ve also taken some time to brainstorm on some ideas on how to get there. So now let’s set in Write down three to five goals that would make the biggest impact in your life. To start bridging the gap from Step 3 while staying in alignment with your values from step 2. So right now I want you to write them down and make sure they fit the smarter framework specific measurable actionable realistic time bound exciting and relevant to your series of life. Don’t worry if this takes a few tries especially if you haven’t done this much before. Keep at it and adjust until they fit. Once you’ve completed this task I want to congratulate you because you’re now in the 1 percent of people who have written goals. But we can’t stop here if we actually want to achieve them. Join me in the next section where we go from goal setting to goal achievement.